The Power of the Pause

Pause. Take a moment or two or longer, if needed.  Pause before going further.

Pause. Just stop and listen to your breathing. Feel your own heartbeat.

Pause. Silence the hustle and craziness around you, at least for a few moments.

Pause. Welcome this time as a gift to your own health and wellbeing.

Pause. Spend time reflecting on the shapes of the clouds amidst the blue sky.

Pause. Realign your expectations and bring balance into your strategic design.

Pause. Close your eyes and close out all interferences from outside of your mind.

Pause. Minimize all distractions and tighten your focus.  Feel the strength of your soul.

Pause. Absorb the sun and the gentle breeze as you stop and bring stillness to your mind.

Pause. Know your reaction does not need to happen immediately. You have time. Breathe.

Pause. Feel the balance and allow your authentic self to shine brighter.

Pause. Be in the present. Listen to all the sounds of that particular moment in time.

Pause. Grant yourself permission to be mindful, to stop and to pause.

Pause. Experience all the beauty around you and within you.

Pause. Envision what is to be.  Embrace the joy that vision brings.

Pause. This quiet time feeds your core with all that is good, and often needed.

Pause. Be alone, become one, with your energy. 

Pause. Practice the power of the pause.

Martha Jo Asselin, PhD has over 30 years’ experience working in higher education and is currently serving as the Director of the Center for Leadership and Service at the State University of New York – University at Albany. For eight years, she has proudly served as a Board member for the New York State ACE Women’s Network.

New Beginnings

I began a new role as Interim Vice President for Student Affairs and Chief Diversity Officer at the end of July.  I had big ideas for my newly created division. We were going to unpack data, dig deep at how students were experiencing our campus and develop plans for change.  As I started getting daily calls from each of my new direct reports with issues we needed to address immediately, I realized if I sent them the request I was preparing they would all run for the hills.  I needed to take a step back and reevaluate my expectations with COVID and how it was impacting my direct reports.  I am a huge fan of Brene Brown and her advice around understanding that people are doing the best they can has been transformational for me as a leader.  I remind myself of this often and it is powerful every time.  If I approach people both personally and professionally recognizing that what I expect and what is realistic in the moment may not match has help guide me to better meet people where they are and work with them to move to where I need them to be.

In the age of COVID, I am finding that people need you to listen and understand their perspective.  Leadership in crisis sometimes has us forget our core values and forget that we only know a little bit of what is going on in the lives of the folx around us.  I recently had a situation that was personally difficult.  I had staff extremely concerned about their well being in COVID and created a situation that I felt didn’t take in to account the risk they brought to others.  Luckily, we have all tested negative so that concern has been alleviated.  In all honesty, I didn’t even process how hurt I was by the situation until it was completely over and I was home. I had to have a serious conversation with my coach and yes, be sure you have a strong mentor or coach in your life to help navigate what can be extremely difficult situations.  Through my conversation I realized I needed to take a step back and come up with a plan to better understand the perspective of some of the staff in my area.  I do also think it will be critical for them to understand my perspective as well.  For me as a leader, it is crucial that I am accessible and willing to lean into difficult conversations being mindful that we all have so much going on in our lives that impact our perspective and we all need to be keep this in mind.

We are truly all doing the best we can. 

Mary Bonderoff, EdD (she, her, hers) is currently the Interim Vice President for Student Affairs and Chief Diversity Officer at SUNY Morrisville and has worked in the SUNY system for 30 years. She serves as the Associate Chair for the NY ACE Women’s Network

Within Crisis, There is the Opportunity to Reassess and Renew

I started 2020 as many people did making perennial goals to strive toward.  Then there was COVID.  With it feeling as if the earth had fallen off its axis, we were thrown into a spiralizing chaos and while it started with the pandemic, it seemed that all things had come to a head.  Working in higher education, I have observed in the last few months institutions in reaction mode to the rapid change and uncertainty that has enveloped the world.  It was no longer that institutions, systems and infrastructures could change, but rather that they now have to change in order to not just merely survive but to thrive. A colleague said to me “Within crisis, there is opportunity.” Institutions have recognized at the center of the vortex of this storm, there is the opportunity to reassess and renew institutional missions, visions and strategies necessary to move into an uncertain future.  While this is happening at our respective institutions and organizations, this is also an opportunity to reassess and renew our own personal and professional missions, visions and strategies.  This has become an opportunity to explore our lives before COVID and to reimagine our lives for the future to come.  For many, personal and professional priorities have shifted in the wake of the pandemic. I know they have for me. So how can we as individuals emerge into this new world, this uncertain future with renewed purpose and vision?  I have used this time to reassess my personal and professional goals, to silence the voices and expectations of others and to discern my own voice and vision.  Parker Palmer in his profound book Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation said “Before you tell your life what you intend to do with it, listen for what it intends to do with you.  Before you tell your life what truths and values you have decided to live up to, let your life tell you what truths you embody, what values you represent.”  And so, I have used this opportunity found in crisis to reassess and renew my values, to realign personal and professional goals with my values and to identify and initiate actions in alignment with those values and goals. While some may view this process of personal and professional life planning indulgent, others may view it as an absolute necessity in order to pivot, to not just survive but thrive in this rapidly changing world.  If anything, this crisis has reminded us of the value of life and how finite it is. As poet Mary Oliver, asks in her poem The Summer Day, “What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”

Kenya Nyota Lee is an administrator at Baruch College, CUNY; NYC Regional Coordinator of the NY ACE Women’s Network; and a doctoral student at Northeastern University.

Blog Schedule & Topics

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Month: August  2020
Theme: Summer to Fall                                 
Topic: Using Summer to Reassess and Renew

Month: September 2020
Theme: New Beginnings                                 
Topic: Mindfulness and Leadership

Month: October 2020
Theme: Civic Responsibility, Strategy                                
Topic: Strategic Partnerships and Civic Role

Month: November 2020
Theme: Thanksgiving                               
Topic: Practicing Gratitude

Month: December 2020
Theme: Gift giving                                
Topic: Inspiring Others, The Gifts We Bring Forth

Month: January 2021
Theme: New Year’s Resolution                               
Topic: Goals for Ourselves for the New Year

Month: February 2021
Theme: Valentine’s Day                                
Topic: Love for Career

Month: March 2021
Theme: Women’s History                               
Topic: Reflection of Women Trailblazers in Your Life

Month: April 2021
Theme: Earth Day, Spring                               
Topic: Earth Day, Spring

Month: May 2021
Theme: Well-Being/Health                                
Topic: Wellness-Work-Life Balance

Month: June 2021
Theme: Commencement                               
Topic: Reflections of Lessons Learned this Academic Year

Month: July 2021
Theme: Independence                                
Topic: Being True to Living Authentically

A Time for Reflection, Reassessment and Renewal

Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “Only in the darkness can one see the stars”.   His words inspire hope in my mind, heart, and soul.  They help strengthen my inner being, build my resiliency and gratitude, and remind me about the power in positivity. Especially during this time of global crises and movements; King’s words spark a grand light of promise for me. I refuse to fixate on the ugliness of the world around me.  I need to see the stars and know there is change coming that will build a better tomorrow. Yes, it took a pandemic for me to feel liberated.

Yes, it took a pandemic for me to change my ways. I have not worn high heels or uncomfortable shoes in over five months and my feet, knees and legs thank me.  I have not had to spend hours on my hair and makeup to get ready for the day at the office.  Instead, I have embraced my authentic self and let the true color of my natural hair sparkle like tinsel from the light reflected from my computer screen. My complexion has never felt healthier and is not missing all the foundation I once wore to conceal my years of experiences.  I have not had to iron clothes in preparation for the week ahead, instead I have cleaned out my closets and donated many beautiful items to worthy causes.  I have seriously reflected on the difference between ‘needs’ and ‘wants’ and, accordingly, I have made better decisions.

While I spend more hours on my electronic devices, I am also connecting more to my family and friends, communities, and the world around me more so than ever before.  I have celebrated my faith through ‘attending’ various masses held around the world in some grand and beautiful churches. And I have learned more than I ever knew about some truly amazing woman who overcame incredible challenges and did amazing deeds to have become amazing Saints of today.  Technology, video calls, emails, social media, and texts have all taken on a new level of importance as my soul is fueled with knowledge and connections.  My adult sons’ check-in more often and the miles between us are dissolved. I have reconnected with friends and relatives from around the globe.  And what a blessing it was to feel fully “there” at the one-year birthday celebration for my grand nephew who lives far away. Yes, it took a pandemic for me to become better connected to my loved ones. 

I am reading more than I ever have. Eager to soak up the truths and solve grand mysteries. I have had time to reflect upon successes and failures, not only in my own life, but in our nation’s history.  I have fully committed to continue my growth and development by intently learning, listening, observing, understanding, and changing.  I am filled with hopefulness as campuses embrace dialogues about the appropriateness of statues and names of roads and buildings; as we review and rewrite policies and practices to build equity and equality; and as we build coalitions to address the deepest rooted needs of our campus and surrounding communities.  Yes, it took a pandemic for us to come to our senses.

Staying positive through challenging times does not mean that all will work out beautifully in the end. However, what it does do is builds one’s confidence in knowing that they, no matter how things work out in the end, will be stronger.  It took a pandemic for me to fully believe in the promise of an authentic, better connected, stronger, healthier, more united tomorrow.

Martha Jo Asselin, PhD has over 30 years’ experience working in higher education and is currently serving as the Director of the Center for Leadership and Service at the State University of New York – University at Albany.  For eight years she has proudly served as a Board member for the New York State ACE Women’s Network.